On the subject of The Dank...

I am pleased to inform the universe that I have found my sports bar in Miami.

It is called Tom's. And it has The Dank.

I love The Dank.

Good food, full bar, hot chicks, football (American and Euro, a.k.a. soccer). Good times. Love it.

Let's give them a plug: http://www.tomsnfl.com/

So, I got a question from my dear friend, asking me... what is The Dank?

I feel inclined to share my observations on the phenomenon.

The Dank can hardly be described…but it can be romanticized. I shall endeavor to do both to the best of my meager literary ability.

The Dank is a very important part of any certain drinking establishment. The Dank is an ambiance, an atmosphere.

The Dank cannot be measured by high-class or low class establishments. Some low class establishments may be dark and gloomy, but they don’t have The Dank. Many high-class establishments have plenty of Dank to go around. The Dank should not be confused with gloom, though certainly, a little gloom helps. It is not something that can be seen, it is something that is felt. When you are in a good watering hole with The Dank… well, you just know it.

The Dank reflects the mood of times past and the promise of times to come. The Dank is ghosts of what-was, moving through you as you walk about the place…and The Dank is spirits-of-what-will-be, in front of you, awaiting the future and inhabiting the vibe of what’s yet to come.

The Dank is dark and light occupying the same time and space. The Dank is a place where if you move to the left, you can be in the shadows all alone with your torment... and if you move to the right… you can be in the light, laughing and drinking with old and newfound friends.

The Dank is part of a place where only another person can soothe your pain… and here….a couple stare lovingly in each other's eyes…. and there…. someone is looking longingly in a glass, deep in a dream of someone. Who knows? It could be you.

The Dank is a dark, cozy little environment...where, out of the corner of your eye, you see for the briefest of instants....Sinatra... with his trademark hat.... sitting at the end of the bar alone....with a drink and a cigarette...and when you turn to look... in that same instant, he's gone...and you could have swore he tipped his hat before he left... and the vision of a young, beautiful Ava Gardner flashes for just a second through the deepest recesses of your mind.

The Dank is a quarter to three.... and there's no one in the place... except you and me.

The Dank is a reflection of LIFE, it holds the memory patterns of shattered dreams, broken hearts, newfound loves, enlightened epiphanies, sadistic thoughts, creative endeavors, lonely nights and life-long unions… The Dank is a memory imprint of the world… and the LIVES of people who have LIVED at one time or another in that very place. The Dank is romance and The Dank is murder.

Many places do not have this quality because it cannot be manufactured. No construct builder or sterile corporate mentality can effectively produce or reproduce The Dank…it comes from the history of a place, the ghosts of people and events past… and the potential of people and events yet to follow.

You won’t find The Dank at TGIFridays. It inhabits the dwelling of wholly original drinking establishments throughout our world. That’s half the fun of The Dank… finding just the right place that’s got it. Then drinking with it like you would an old friend, because for some of us, that’s exactly what it is.

The Dank is The Dank.

You either got it or you don't.

And if you don't, you probably never will.

I love The Dank.